I’d never considered myself particularly ‘good’ at meditation (that might come as a surprise given I’m a yoga teacher). I’ve tried it many times over the years, but I’ve often given up because my mind would be busy, thoughts would pop up constantly, and I’d think, “I’m obviously not very good at this.”
But that all changed when I realised that my goal was wrong from the start. I was approaching meditation with the idea that I needed to still my mind – this was the be all and end all of the practice, and if I sat down and my mind was still busy, I’d failed.
I think it was the Headspace app where I eventually turned a corner as he constantly referred to mediation as observing the mind as opposed to emptying the mind. And the great thing I very quickly realised was that you can’t really fail at observing your mind – you always win! If a thought appears, you notice it, if another thought appears, you notice that too and if your mind wanders off into a completely random story about something that happened three days ago… you notice that as well. You have successfully observed your mind 👏
The more I practiced (I started with 15 mins a day and that’s what I tend to still do), the more I started noticing something else: my mind would actually become quieter anyway as part of the process. Not because I was forcing it to be quiet, but because I wasn’t fighting the thoughts anymore. I was simply observing them, noticing where my attention had gone, and bringing it back. More space started to arrive in my mind throughout the practice without me having to constantly battle.
That realisation completely changed how I approached meditation. It also inspired this week’s Yin class, where I decided to treat each posture as a mini meditation. Rather than asking everyone to try to ‘calm your minds’, we experimented with different ways of noticing thoughts, relating to them and then bringing our attention back to the breath.
And you don’t need to sit cross-legged for 20 minutes to try them. These are little experiments you can use for a few minutes at home, during a walk (I do this a lot), in bed or whenever you notice your mind becoming particularly busy.
Here are six techniques to try…
1. Choose an anchor word
This is one I’ve been experimenting with myself recently, and I’ve been surprised by how effective it can be. You choose a simple word that you can use as an anchor to bring your focus back whenever your mind wanders.
I would often choose the word ‘breathe’ but recently I came up with word the “later” and this seems be more effective for me. So, when a thought pops into my head that doesn’t need my attention right now, such as “what am I going to cook tonight?”, I simply say the word “later” to myself. The idea isn’t to push the thought away permanently or tell yourself that you shouldn’t be thinking about it, I’m just saying “I don’t need to deal with you right now.” And I’ve found that quite often the thought disappears for a while.
So, try choosing your own anchor word — later, pause, back, breathe (or any other word that makes sense to you) and see what happens.
2. Name the thought
When a thought appears, instead of following it, simply label what your mind is doing.
You might silently say:
Planning
Remembering
Worrying
Judging
Replaying
Imagining
Then come back to your breath, your footsteps, your crocheting, whatever you’re doing! The important thing is not to analyse the thought, you’re simply noticing: “This is what my mind is doing right now.” Sometimes creating that little bit of distance is enough to stop us getting swept along with the thought.
3. Count your breaths
Give your mind a very simple job: Count each inhale or exhale from 1 to 10 and when you reach 10, simply start again. Inevitably, you’ll get distracted – you might get to six and suddenly realise you’ve been thinking about work for the last two minutes. That’s completely fine – sometimes I’ll get to two and my mind has already wandered. Each time you notice the mind has wandered, simply return to one. The aim isn’t to get to ten without thinking about anything else – the practice is noticing when the mind has wandered and gently bringing it back. In fact, every time you notice you’ve become distracted is a mini success 👏
4. Listen for sounds
For this one, let sounds become your anchor. Close your eyes and notice:
- the closest sound
- the furthest sound
- a continuous sound
- an occasional sound
- sounds inside the room
- sounds outside
You don’t need to identify them, just listen to them.
This is particularly lovely when you’re outside or somewhere with natural sounds around you – I often do this on a walk – just stop for a moment on a bench, close my eyes and see what sounds come my way. I was hoping the birds would play game in the cabin last night but they all decided to keep their beaks firmly shut – thanks guys 🙄. Even the dog next door didn’t have anything to say for a change 😅
5. Find two sensations
This was a good one to practice in Yin as there are always sensations to tune into when we’re in posture. You bring your attention into the body and find:
- One sensation you enjoy
- One sensation you don’t particularly like or is a bit uncomfortable
Then simply observe them – you don’t have to change them. In a Yin posture, it’s interesting to notice what happens to them, if they change, do they become more intense or start to dissipate as time goes on? This can be a really interesting exercise because we often react automatically to our experiences with thoughts such as:
“I like this”
“I don’t like this”
“I wonder how long until this ends!”
Instead, we’re practicing simply noticing.
Whilst this is great to practice in Yin, you could also do it whilst walking – maybe you notice the breeze on your face and an uncomfortable sensation in the arch of your foot and you simply observe the sensations as you walk along.
6. Ask: “Is this useful right now?”
I like this one – it’s a bit like the ‘later’ technique that I use. So when a thought appears, ask yourself: “Is this useful to me right now?”
If the answer is no, try to set it aside for now. You might follow it with your anchor word: “Later” or whatever yours is.
For example:
“I need to remember to buy toothpaste” – not useful right now.
“I wonder if they were annoyed with me earlier?” – not useful right now.
But: “My knee is telling me I need to come out of this position” – yes, very useful, you should listen to that one.
This isn’t about ignoring your thoughts – it’s about learning to distinguish between information that needs our attention and thoughts that can wait.
Meditation isn’t about stopping thoughts
Based on my own experience, the most important takeaway from this topic that I can offer is that meditation isn’t about stopping thoughts. Our minds are designed to think – we live in a noisy world with endless distractions and worries so thoughts will always appear. The practice is noticing when we’ve become caught up in one and learning that we have a choice about whether we follow it or not.
So maybe give some of these techniques a try and see if one works well for you 😊
Michelle x
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